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BETWEEN BARACK AND A HARD PLACE: Is President Obama “Too Nice” for America’s Own Good?

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“The name ‘Barack Obama’ is about as Black as a name can get. Barack Obama! That’s right next to Dikembe Mutombo! As soon as you hear the name “Barack Obama” you expect to see a brother with a spear standin’ on top of a dead lion! You expect to see the bass player from The Commodores come out! I’m not talkin’ about Lionel Richie, I’m talkin’ about them shiny niggas behind him!” ~Chris Rock

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ONE OF MY FACEBOOK FRIENDS was recently complaining about not being able to find a “nice guy” to date. She was actually starting to question what kind of “energy” she was putting out in the universe that was somehow cosmically narrowing her romantic opportunities down to an endless amount of Charlie Sheens. While I sympathized with her situation, I also felt the need to shut down a popular female “talking point” – That women actually want nice guys for something more than just a shoulder to cry on once Charlie pulls up his pants and insensitively walks away through a trail of her salty tears.

Anyway, I simply told her that women don’t want nice guys, they want a guy who’s sharp enough to keep their attention, but smooth enough to not “cut them” in the process. They want PASSION – Which is why they end up giving it up to the “Bad Boys” who are more exciting than the “Good Boys” who have about as much passion as Wolf Blitzer waiting in line at the DMV (on Sunday).

In any case, I finally said: “I honestly don’t believe you want a nice guy since I’m sure you’ve said the often-heard phrase: “He’s a nice guy, BUT…..’”

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…And she agreed.

And this is exactly the problem with President Obama – Everyone knows he’s a nice guy, BUT – No one sees him as that “brother with a spear standing on top of a dead lion (or more appropriately, a dead elephant).”

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Even John Edwards criticized “Senator” Obama on the Iowa campaign trail back in 2007 when he questioned his “spunk” and said he wouldn’t be able to battle special interests groups in Washington D.C.

“I hear people say you can sit at a table with these people, negotiate with them, and they will volunteer their power away. That is a complete fantasy. You can’t “NICE” these people to death. Special interests will never give their power away. The only way we are going to get their power away is to TAKE their power away from them, and we have an epic fight in front of us. You’d better send somebody into that arena who’s ready for the fight.”

Damn, that’s gotta sting coming from a metrosexual who spends $400 on his haircuts so he can look like a Ken doll…..

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Speaking of disgraced adulterers who’ve lost everything, Tiger Woods was turned into an odd “role model” of sorts (courtesy of Bill Maher) for how the Democrats should handle the Republicans:

“The Republicans kept saying things like, the healthcare bill was being “shoved down our throats” or the Democrats were “ramming it through.” The bill was so big they couldn’t take it all at once! And I realized listening to this rhetoric that it reminded me of something – Tiger Woods’ text messages to his mistress where he said, and I quote: “I want to treat you rough, throw you around, spank and slap you and make you sore. I want to hold you down and choke you while I fuck that ass that I own. Then I’m going to tell you to shut the fuck up while I slap your face and pull your hair for making noise.” (Unquote) – And this, I believe, perfectly represents the attitude Democrats should now have in their dealings with the Republican Party: “Shut the fuck up while I slap your face for making noise!”

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“The Democrats need to push the rest of their agenda while their boot is on the neck of the greedy, poisonous old reptile. Democrats in America were put on earth to do one thing: drag the ignorant hillbilly half of this country into the next century, which in their case is the 19th.” ~Bill Maher (2010)

But that was last year – Before Obama gave in to the Republicans and extended Bush’s tax cuts (which added $600 billion in lost revenue to the national debt) and before he surrendered once again by letting Eric “Conflict of Interest” Cantor and John Boehner run all over him during the hostage negotiations debt-ceiling fiasco.

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Today, Bill seems to echo Ken’s sentiments from 4 years ago…

Tim Wise, activist and author of many brilliant books with equally brilliant titles, says the Obama “cheerleaders” should stop spinning the unspinnable:

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“The President has surrendered. This is not “master chess,” or “the art of the possible.” It is capitulation. “The Right” has won, and the nation will suffer for it. He had options. He refused to exercise them – Period. The Democrats have proven they are gutless. They are about to give the GOP a deal that involves no revenue increases and trillions in spending cuts, even though two-thirds of the public want a more mixed approach. These people stand for nothing.” ~Tim Wise

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Let’s face it America, President Obama is just too damn soft for our own good.

Say whatever you want about George W. Bush, but he just didn’t give a fuck.

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Al Gore got 539,898 more votes than him? Bush stole the Presidency anyway! Saddam Hussein had nothing to do with 9/11 & Iraq had no WMDs?! Bush bombed them anyway! Hurricane Katrina victims need HELP?!? Bush doesn’t even know what you’re talking about!

Seriously – Bush could have started a war with Canada and gotten away with it. He would have even had a slogan that would rally up the troops…..

BOMB CANADA! THEY’VE BEEN ON TOP OF US FOR TOO DAMN LONG!!!”

And instantly, 70% of Americans (in corporate/televised polls) would automatically be down with that bullshit………………

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It might sound crazy, but Barack could learn a LOT from George – Like how to be a ruthless asshole who points at people.

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Aiiiiight Barack, you got the idea, but lower your finger and lose the corny ass smile…..

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Okay, I love the finger, but that damn smile is still trying to sneak out…..

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What the FUCK!?! NOOOOO DAMMIT!!! Why are you playing golf with John Boehner!? And what the hell are you pointing at anyway!?! Is that your DIGNITY over there?!?!

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YES!!!!!!!!!!! That’s the ONE!!! Point ‘em OUT! Mean mug on them fools!!!

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That’s RIGHT! Make your RAPPER homies point at ‘em! MOVE, BITCH!!! Get out the WAY!!!!!!!

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OH SHIT!!! You got beats, son? You got BEATS!?!?!

FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!! POP A CAP IN THAT NIGGA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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(Uh…….. I mean………. Hold up a second……)

Look Mr. President, all I’m trying to say is that you need to fight for “The People” the same exact way George W. Bush fought for millionaires and billionaires. Your party runs two-thirds of the government and outnumbers the Republicans by 17 million more registered voters in the electorate. Contrary to Republican Propaganda popular belief, America is NOT a “conservative” country…..

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…..So you have NO excuse for expanding their wars, continuing their tax cuts, co-signing their warped policies, or alienating your base, just to pander to people who only want to see you (and America) FAIL.

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But to be fair, I have considered the fact that since you are the “Jackie Robinson” of Presidents, you may be enduring extreme elements of psychological torment far beyond the average man’s realm of comprehension that inexplicably forces you to do dumb shit on occasion.

And yes, it’s also quite possible that you’re “strategizing” by following “The 48 Laws Of Power” (LAW 45: “Preach the need for change, but never reform too much at once”) or simply using the Pseudo-Machiavellian tactic of keeping your friends close while keeping your enemies closer – But, if you and John Boehner (The Republican Speaker of the House) get any “closer” I’ll be expecting a joint announcement from you two saying you’re having a baby through a surrogate.

Just remember Mr. President – The same Republicans that you’re trying to “NICE” to death…..

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….are constantly plotting to KILL your career.

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But unfortunately, I’m beginning to believe that your constant “bi-partisanship” goes beyond “being nice” – At this point, it’s clearly a case of one of three circumstances: Either you’re ignorant (and don’t realize that you’re only losing votes), you’re impotent (and too weak & scared to fight back) or you’re IN ON IT (and intentionally selling out everyone who voted for you and your country in the process).

Only time will tell…..

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“Mr. President, it is beyond admirable in your position and at this time of fearful division in this country that you view yourself as president of everyone, not as your predecessor did, only as the president just of those who voted for you – But you must at long last come to terms of the fact that you spent the first 18 months and one day of your presidency bending over backwards for the other people, and they have spent the same time insisting that you are not actually president, or you are a communist (or a socialist) – Mr. President, please stop trying to act, every minute, like some noble, neutral figure chairing a government of equal and dispassionate minds and contemplated scholars. It’s a freaking WAR out here!” ~Keith Olbermann

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~CHASE SWAYZE

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UNREASONABLE DOUBT: The Case Against Casey & The System Itself

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“I hate a liar more than I hate a thief – A thief is only after my salary, but a liar is after my reality.” ~50 Cent

NANCY GRACE HAS AS MUCH TACT AS A SLEDGEHAMMER being thrown through a greenhouse. To say her vibe is over-sensationalism on crack is an understatement – She makes the “Aflac Duck” look like Kate Middleton. To her credit however, Nancy was the only one who consistently reported on “The Disappearance of Caylee Anthony” (albeit, ad-nauseam) from day one back in 2008. But ironically, it may have been her lack of grace that initially turned me off and essentially led me to ignore the case for almost 3 years.

Inevitably, I only started paying attention during the last week of the trial… Call me naïve, but based on the overwhelming amount of evidence (both circumstantial and forensic) it seemed to be the text-book definition of an open & shut case.

So let me see if I’ve got this straight: There’s this pregnant 19 year-old teenager who wanted to give up her unborn child for adoption, but her mother stopped her and insisted that she keep it – So, she reluctantly keeps the child, but still keeps “partying” at the same rate as before, even going as far as taking her toddler to “adult parties” late at night. Then, while she’s moving in with her new boyfriend a few years later, she asks her neighbor if she can borrow a shovel and almost instantly, no one sees her kid anymore, but the mom keeps “happily partying” as if everything’s normal while she enters “Hard Body” contests at clubs, gets a “Bella Vita” (“Beautiful Life”) tattoo, and pathologically lies to her friends & family (and later lies to the cops) about her child’s whereabouts for 31 straight days until her own mother calls 911, finally forcing her to admit that her baby’s been “missing” for 31 straight days while even her own mother has to admit to the 911 operator: I found my daughter’s car today and it smells like there’s been a dead body in the damn car!”

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In all seriousness, it completely insults my intelligence whenever I hear someone say: “There just wasn’t enough evidence to convict her…”

(Please…………….)

EVIDENCE TO CONVICT HER (From multiple sources): Traces of chloroform (a chemical that makes people unconscious) were found in Casey Anthony’s car trunk and evidence was found that someone had searched the Internet on her computer for the use of the chemical and how to make it. On November 26, 2008, officials released 700 pages of documents related to the Anthony investigation, which included evidence of Google searches of the terms “neck breaking”, “how to make chloroform”, and “death” on Casey Anthony’s home computer. On February 18, 2009, documents released by the State Attorney’s Office in Florida indicated that the same type of laundry bag, duct tape, and plastic bags discovered at the crime scene were found in the house where Casey and Caylee resided.”

MORE EVIDENCE TO CONVICT HER: “University of Tennessee’s “Body farm” discovered “hair banding,” a phenomenon in which hair roots can form a dark band after death. A hair found in the trunk of the Anthony car exhibited this pattern. Also, air extracted from the trunk of the Anthony car revealed human decomposition and the presence of chloroform. Deputy Jason Forgey, a cadaver dog handler with the Orange County Sheriff’s Office K-9 unit, testified that his dog alerted officers that there had been a dead body in the trunk of Anthony’s car. Forensic entomologist Dr. Neal Haskell testified that Caylee Anthony’s body was in the woods (15 houses away from Casey’s house with duct tape over her mouth & nose) since June or early July of 2008. He said the types of bugs (“Coffin Flies”) found at the crime scene indicated the body had been there a long time. Haskell also said bugs found in Casey Anthony’s car trunk showed the toddler’s body was there for a short time before being removed.”

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AND YET, EVEN MORE EVIDENCE TO CONVICT HER: Over 1,000 new pages of documents were released Tuesday in the case against Casey Anthony. They include a statement that an FBI investigator saw an outline of a small body in the fetal position in Casey’s trunk (read FBI document). The FBI says the child’s back, bottom and legs could be seen most clearly. WFTV legal analyst Bill Sheaffer says it adds to the hair and air in the trunk showing evidence of decomposition: “Why is a child’s body gonna be in the trunk of that car dead or alive? It’s significant that the child’s body was in the trunk of that car,” Sheaffer said. NOTE: Dr. Jan Garavaglia, chief medical examiner for Orange and Osceola Counties, ruled that the manner of Caylee’s death was “a homicide” and that the cause of Caylee’s death was “homicide of undetermined means.” Garavaglia said that chloroform could “absolutely” cause a child’s death and insisted that homicide was “the only logical conclusion” in this death.”

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BREAKING NEWS: Casey Anthony’s attorney would like everyone to forget everything they’ve just heard!!!

INTRODUCING: THE JOSE BAEZ STRATEGY FOR DEFENDING CASEY ANTHONY!!!

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1. Say that Caylee accidently drowned (Without any evidence).

2. Throw Casey’s dad under the bus as often as possible and say that he molested Casey when she was a child (Without any evidence).

3. Repeat 1 & 2 (Without ANY evidence).

However, there’s just one small problem with this strategy……………..

THERE’S NO EVIDENCE.

In fact, Baez’s molestation accusation was so baseless that he wasn’t even allowed to mention it in his closing arguments since he never attempted to prove it during the trial – And regarding the suggestion that Caylee died in a drowning accident, there’s a jailhouse videotape with Casey talking to her parents that essentially erases his whole strategy.

2:15 – Casey’s Mom: “Someone just said that Caylee was dead this morning – That she drowned in the pool. That’s the newest story out there…”

2:25 – Casey: “Surprise, surprise…” (The family quietly agrees it’s a false rumor and then later, Casey says she wants her dad more than anyone else.)

4:12 – Casey’s Dad: “Hey listen, I want you to know, you are the boss through this whole thing, OK? Listen, think of you owning this conglomerate, this huge business. Jose is one of your employees, so is the sheriff`s department, so is the FBI, so am I, so is Lee, so is Mom. You know, we`re all working with you. And if for some reason, something is not being said or being done, you can make a change. You`re the one…” (In later clips, both of Casey’s parents continuously press her about where Caylee might be…)

Feel free to call me crazy, but…………………

THIS COMPLETELY BLOWS YOUR ENTIRE DEFENSE OUT OF THE WATER.

(Pun intended.)

Because even if everything Baez claimed was true, “being molested back in 1992” is a pretty weak reason for why your kid is rotting in the trunk of your car while you’re gleefully grinding on lesbians at the club.

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Smoke & mirrors aside, the craziest part is that even Baez admits that Caylee died on Casey’s watch and that she tried to cover it up: “Casey saw George Anthony (her father) holding Caylee in his arms. She immediately grabbed Caylee and began to cry. She asked for her father’s help and shortly thereafter, George did help. It’s at this moment that Casey should have been stronger. Casey should have called 911. Casey should have done the right thing – And that’s what she’s guilty of – Caylee’s death was covered up.” (Jose Baez’s opening statement)

Well damn, if I was the prosecution, I’d be extremely tempted to thank Jose for literally putting the dead body in his own clients hands (which instantly makes her legally responsible for anything that happens to it from that point on) and admitting that she covered it up (LYING TO AUTHORITIES, TAMPERING WITH EVIDENCE, TAMPERING WITH A CORPSE & OBSTRUCTION OF JUSTICE), then I’d ask him if he’d like to join our prosecution team right after I screamed out “25 TO LIFE, BITCH!!!” and rested my whole fucking case.

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But apparently, Florida was able to find the only 12 people in the state who feel like Hitler was just “misunderstood…”

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I was speechless – I couldn’t understand how jurors from Pinellas County (which has a 95% conviction rate according to HLN News) could say the only thing she was guilty of is lying.

Naturally, there were endless reasons & excuses for the verdict being thrown around in the media. The defense team said the prosecution didn’t prove their case while “The State of Florida” said that a “dry-bones case is very difficult to prove…” Meanwhile, most of the jury immediately went into hiding, except for the 2 or 3 who went public and repeatedly said “there just wasn’t enough evidence…”

While I clearly understand “The Burden of Proof” is on “The State” and that elements of “Reasonable Doubt” may have been a factor, I started hearing another possible reason given for Casey Anthony’s acquittal and the intense media attention given to the case from day one…..

A few days after the verdict, I was surprised to hear a white, female news anchor ask a legal analyst: “Was Casey Anthony acquitted because she’s a young, attractive, white female, who the jury was more sympathetic towards?” A few days later, a variation of this same question was directed towards Dr. Drew (in writing) on his talk show: “The issue of race: Did being a young, Caucasian female aid in Casey’s perception of innocence?”

His response was so honest, yet so nervous, that I re-winded my DVR three times in order to capture his answer verbatim: “And this is a… uh…. I’ll tell you what…. This is a painful question to even think about and I’ll let each of you decide for yourself whether you think that had a significant role to play here. I’m fearful that it might have contributed… And let’s all give that some real thought. We’re… We’re… Looking… Duuit…. Checking our souls on this one…” (Dr. Drew: 7/18/11And yes, he actually made a noise that sounded like “DUUIT” – And yeah, I tried to spell it.) ;-)

Racial babbling aside, it’s truly rare to witness white people actually admitting to the existence of white privilege…

But are we really checking our souls?

According to the Innocence Project, there have been 273 post-conviction DNA exonerations in United States history. Approximately 70% of the people exonerated by DNA testing were non-white (in a country that is 70% white). The average sentence served by these innocent “convicts” was 13 years, compared with the acquittal & zero years that a Texas jury awarded a white man named Robert Durst (back in 2001) who actually admitted to killing, beheading, and dismembering his neighbor with a knife, two saws and an axe before coldly dumping his body parts in Galveston Bay.

Meanwhile, the same system that let Durst go free, continuously sentences Black men, who didn’t do anything to anyone, to Life and Death….

It happens so often, you almost have to laugh to keep from crying…..

The system is severely broken when it can grant freedom to a white mother who clearly enjoyed covering up her child’s death, while it imprisons a black mother who just wanted to improve her child’s education…

Especially when that system does it repeatedly…..

If you’re Black, the system is literally backwardsYou’re guilty until proven otherwise…

BTW: Anyone thinking “O.J.” is an example of “A Black Man getting away with murder” (And yes, that Negro was clearly guilty), is forgetting a few key things – He was also rich and famous, and yet he still needed a “Black Jury(9 Blacks, 1 Hispanic & 2 Whites) with Johnny Cochran (and “The Dream Team”) defending him in front of an Asian judge – And THEN, he got away with murder.

Meanwhile, all Casey Anthony needed was to be white…

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…And even her own lawyer admitted that if the victim and the defendant were not white, we never would have even heard of the victim, and the defendant would be just another no-name criminal on death row.

But at the end of the day, this case was about an innocent little girl who was better off not knowing about our society’s superficial fixation on race, class and social status. Before she died, Caylee was gradually becoming a great swimmer thanks to the patient attention of her loving grandparents, George and Cindy Anthony. She liked Winnie The Pooh, Spiderman, and that big, purple dinosaur named Barney. She loved to dance, color in her coloring books, play dress up, and unlike most toddlers, she even loved eating green beans – Although her favorite book “Suppertime for Frieda Fuzzypaws” might have slightly influenced her diet.

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It’s a story about a finicky kitten who only wants to eat cookies for dinner, but her parents won’t give it to her until after she eats her supper – A healthy meal that included macaroni and green beans – And even though the book was recommended for kids twice her age, two year old Caylee still learned the lesson well.

Caylee Marie Anthony was a pure soul who didn’t deserve to be born to a heartless mother who cared more about her own happiness at the club, than the precious life of her child. Caylee should be here with us right now – She should be enjoying her summer, running through water sprinklers in her backyard, laughing at Sponge Bob Square Pants, and playing with her stuffed animals…..

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But instead, she’s gone forever.

I guess happy endings are for animated movies and Hallmark cards, but if there’s anything to be gained from losing Caylee, it’s that the proposed law named after her (“Caylee’s Law”) will be modified and strengthened so that no one else can “ignore their missing child” for an unreasonable period of time without facing JUSTICE.

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“I didn’t want to involve a bunch of people that maybe didn’t know the situation. The biggest mistake was not calling the cops right off the bat, but the worst thing is that I’ve done this to my daughter…” ~Casey Anthony (2008)

~Chase Swayze

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